35.
“Your Highness, you really have returned!”
As soon as Philomel entered the room, Countess Deles beamed with joy.
“It’s been a while, Countess.”
“Where on earth have you been all this time? You didn’t even say a word to me, even though we’ve been together for so long!”
“……I’m sorry. I couldn’t tell you.”
“No, no. Just the fact that you’ve returned is enough. I was so worried that something might have happened to you, Princess….”
Sniffling, the Countess pulled Philomel into a tight embrace.
“Welcome back. Truly.”
The Countess’s body and voice were both trembling. The reception was far more intense than I had expected, leaving me a bit flustered, but I slowly patted her back.
“I’m home.”
However, the Countess was not the only one who had been waiting for Philomel until this late hour.
“Your Highness, I’ve missed you so much!”
“I knew you would come back.”
“You aren’t leaving again, are you? If you’re going to, you must tell us.”
Philomel broke into a cold sweat trying to calm the maids, who were each pouring out their own words.
“You children! I know you’re happy, but what are you doing pestering someone who must be exhausted?”
“We, we’re sorry!”
At the Countess’s reprimand, the maids bowed their heads.
“Please, don’t be too hard on them.”
Philomel stopped the Countess, feeling not entirely bad.
After bathing in the water they had prepared and changing into clean clothes, I felt incredibly refreshed.
By then, the maids had withdrawn, and only the Countess remained in the room.
“Countess, you should go and get some rest, too.”
“No, I am fine. I will spend the night here. Look, I even brought some needlework to keep me busy.”
Sitting in the armchair, the Countess held up her knitting. Knowing why she wanted to stay by my side, Philomel did not insist otherwise.
Philomel sat on a chair in front of the fireplace, waiting for her damp hair to dry.
“Your Highness.”
Suddenly, Countess Deles spoke up.
“……Yes.”
“I will not ask why you left. I am sure many others have already asked you that.”
“…….”
“Instead, please promise me one thing. That you will never leave without a word again. Please, at least tell me before you go.”
“……Yes. I promise.”
After a moment of hesitation, Philomel nodded.
She was the person I had been most concerned about when I left, so even though I knew it was a promise I might find hard to keep, I had no choice but to make it.
Honestly, I was bewildered by the fact that the Countess and the maids worried about and cared for me to this extent.
Given the time we had spent together, I had thought they might occasionally think of me, but I hadn’t expected this depth of affection.
They were the ones who had served me most closely, and it was clear they must have been in the most difficult position because of my disappearance.
What should I call this emotion—feeling sorry for them, yet a little bit happy at the same time?
Meow.
At that moment, a sound from outside broke my train of thought.
Meow, meow.
The crying didn’t stop, and soon after, the sound of scratching against the window glass followed.
“Did a stray cat sneak in?”
The Countess rose from her seat and opened the terrace door slightly.
*Scamper.*
Something like a small ball of fur burst into the room in an instant.
“Oh, my goodness!”
“Meoooow.”
It was a cat.
The cat brushed past the startled Countess and approached Philomel.
“You’re beautiful.”
Philomel marveled at its fur, which was so sparkly it couldn’t simply be called white.
As the cat rubbed its body against Philomel’s leg in a friendly manner, she gathered the courage to stroke its head.
The fur was very fine, not at all like that of a cat roaming the streets. It didn’t look dirty, either.
“I don’t know how it got in here, but the little guy clearly has good taste.”
“It doesn’t shy away from people. Could it belong to someone?”
“Who knows. If it has an owner, they must be searching for it frantically by now. Looking at its condition, it seems to have been raised with a lot of love.”
“I’ve never seen a silver cat before.”
No matter how I looked at it, the cat’s fur was neither gray nor white, but silver.
The Countess, who had been watching Philomel with a satisfied smile as she couldn’t take her eyes off the cat, said, “Shall we look after it here until we find its owner?”
“I’d like that, but I don’t know when I’ll be leaving again….”
The Countess’s face clouded over.
“Are you really going to leave? Can’t you just stay here with us?”
“I am not a Princess. I cannot stay here forever.”
“But the Emperor has been searching for you so desperately. He wouldn’t treat you harshly just because you aren’t his biological daughter.”
“……His Majesty has been searching for me desperately?”
I knew he had been looking for me with eyes like fire, but the word ‘desperately’ didn’t quite fit.
“Indeed.”
However, it was difficult for Philomel to pour cold water on the Countess’s unwavering reply.
“Well. He did say he wanted to put me on the family register, though.”
“Really? And what did you answer?”
“I declined, but he told me to take some time and think about it….”
“Accept it!”
She shouted vigorously before covering her mouth with both hands.
“……Forgive me. That is a matter for you to decide, Your Highness, and I spoke out of turn.”
“Not at all. You said it because you were thinking of me.”
As the Countess, she would naturally want Philomel to live comfortably with her rather than leaving the Imperial Palace where she was born and raised.
“If I may offer my opinion, I think life here isn’t so bad. I am confident that I can treat you very well in the future, too.”
“What you’ve done for me so far is enough.”
“In any case, Princess Ellensia is his biological daughter, so won’t she be doing all the arduous work like heir training and official duties? That’s why it’s fine for you to live comfortably from now on.”
“Thank you for your concern. But I am truly fine.”
Life wouldn’t be very comfortable if I had to share Ellensia’s place, but I was grateful for the Countess’s heart.
Suddenly, Philomel’s gaze shifted to the cat, which was still nearby.
The way it pricked up its ears made it look as if it were listening to the conversation between Philomel and the Countess.
‘That’s impossible.’
Thinking it must be an illusion, Philomel brushed it off.
“I’m really not going anywhere, so go and get some rest.”
While Philomel dried her hair and lay down in bed, the Countess did not put down her knitting.
“I will stay until you fall asleep.”
Thinking that falling asleep quickly would be the best way to let her rest, Philomel closed her eyes.
However, perhaps because she had slept plenty in the Emperor’s bedroom, sleep did not come easily.
The cat, having settled in front of the fireplace, also curled into a ball and closed its eyes, ready for sleep.
I decided to let the cat stay the night. Tomorrow, I would have to find out if there was anyone to look after it until I could find the owner.
To the restless Philomel, the Countess asked in a low voice, “Is there something on your mind?”
If it were things on my mind, there were more than enough. The future, the situations that were subtly different from the novel. And… Ellensia’s mysterious attitude.
Even though it had only happened yesterday, my meeting with Leguin and the secret of my birth felt like it happened an eternity ago.
“My head is just a bit complicated.”
“I may not be of much help, but I can listen to whatever you have to say, so please tell me if you’d like. They say that sometimes just confiding in someone makes the heart feel lighter.”
I was grateful for her heart, but most of my worries were of a kind I could not confide in anyone.
Philomel chose one that was at least safe to speak about.
“Hmm… it’s about His Majesty and Princess Ellensia. By any chance, did anything happen between the two of them while I was gone?”
“Well. I haven’t had the chance to see them up close, either. What do you mean by ‘anything’?”
“I’m not sure how to put it… but for some reason, the two of them seem a bit awkward with each other.”
To be precise, it was only Eustis who was awkward; Ellensia had been very affectionate.
“That is only natural.”
“Natural?”
“Yes. Even if they are parent and child, as people, they only met for the first time a few days ago. Wouldn’t it be stranger if they were intimate?”
“……But don’t people joined by blood have a sort of bond that is different from others?”
Yes. The bond I never had with Eustis.
Living in constant anxiety as if the floor were about to collapse, I had always yearned for a bond between blood relatives.
Though neither Katherine, who shared my blood, nor Leguin were people who could give me such a thing.
The Countess stopped knitting and stared at Philomel.
“Your Highness. Or should I call you Philomel from now on?”
“Call me whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“Philomel, do you remember what I told you about my daughter?”
“Ah, the one who just returned from studying abroad.”
I recalled hearing that the Countess’s daughter had majored in political science at a university in Elita.
“Hoho. My daughter used to say she would marry her father when she grew up, but now she is quite distant with her husband. They are so awkward with each other. If I weren’t there, they probably wouldn’t say a word.”
This was the first time I had heard in detail about her family.
“I believe that, fundamentally, the relationship between parent and child is no different from any other human relationship. Both sides must invest time and effort to maintain a healthy relationship. Just like my husband and daughter are awkward because they’ve been apart, the Emperor and the Princess are likely the same.”
The Countess Deles, who had started moving her hands again, showed signs of her years of experience in her eyes.
“……Is that so.”
Hearing the Countess’s story made me even more confused.
‘In the book, the Emperor and Ellensia became a very special father-daughter pair as soon as they met.’
“While we’re on the subject, I’d like to introduce you to my family. After hearing my stories, everyone is dying to meet you.”
Countess Deles said, her eyes sparkling.
“Me?”
Philomel replied, feeling bitter.
“If you must leave this place, how about staying at my home for a while? I was planning on heading down to my estate to take a long rest anyway.”
“What about your work as a lady-in-waiting?”
“Since you won’t be here, I should quit.”
“But if you became Princess Ellensia’s lady-in-waiting instead…”
“Oh my. Did you think I was the kind of person who changes whom I serve so easily? I’m a bit hurt.”
The Countess replied playfully.
“My daughter has returned, so I was just about to head down to the estate. It is not because of you, Philomel, so please don’t worry about it.”
“…….”
Philomel knew this was a lie for her sake. The Countess loved her job dearly, and in the original story, she would later become Ellensia’s lady-in-waiting.
“It is the countryside, but it is a quiet, peaceful place with kindhearted people. I am sure you will like it if you come.”
Philomel thought, using the voice that described her hometown as a lullaby.
Perhaps she had built walls around herself for a long, long time.
Thinking that she was Ellensia’s person anyway, she had tried not to get closer than a certain point. She didn’t want to become a villainess who was punished for coveting what belonged to the protagonist.
Was there perhaps something else she had given up on out of preemptive fear, besides Countess Deles?
‘If there is… even now….’
Meow. In the fading consciousness, it felt like the sound of the cat crying was audible as well.