45.
‘I should have told her before Lady Diaz noticed.’
I had been too complacent.
By way of excuse, the reason I let it slide when Ri-Na first called me Everett Rohas was that I had never anticipated ending up in such a relationship with her. I thought there was no need to correct her misunderstanding since we would likely never meet again.
As we continued to meet, the recognition that I was using a pseudonym faded. And once our relationship progressed to this point, the time I spent with Ri-Na became so precious that the thought never crossed my mind.
Edwin had been far too busy recently. The time he spent with Ri-Na was snatched from a schedule split into minutes, which led to a simplification of his thinking.
*I just need to finish this quickly so I can have time to see Ri-Na,* was about the extent of it.
Though there were days when it weighed on his mind, it was only fleeting. His feelings for Ri-Na were genuine, so he had thought little of it. There were even days when he thought it romantic that their relationship was built solely on seeing each other for who they were, unconstrained by status.
His vision had been too narrow to think deeply about how Ri-Na might perceive it. Like a horse wearing blinders.
Edwin checked Ri-Na’s expression out of the corner of his eye.
‘Is it better if I bring it up first?’
It wasn’t intentional, but she might still feel offended—especially if she found out through a source other than me. Coming clean now would likely make her feel less disappointed.
While Edwin was deliberating, Ri-Na opened her mouth first.
“Lord Rohas, is something worrying you?”
Edwin’s eyes wavered violently.
‘Yes. Something just came up.’ For instance, *how to bring up and confess my true identity to Ri-Na.*
Ri-Na’s words felt like a final chance given by someone who already knew everything. In retrospect, his relationship with Ri-Na was like hardened sugar syrup. It was sweet, but shallow. It was fortunate that it hadn’t shattered yet.
‘Have I become too lax just because I haven’t died from letting my guard down for a moment?’ Edwin reproached himself. He carefully organized his thoughts with the mindset of making a confession.
But strangely, Ri-Na still called him “Everett Rohas.” It was someone else’s name, though a name he had been using as his own lately.
‘Was my guess wrong?’
If the person in front of him had been any other noble young lady, he would have thought she knew everything and was being sarcastic, but this was Ri-Na. Sincere anger would have suited her better than sarcasm.
‘Better this way, I suppose.’
He had gained a chance to confess before the worst-case scenario occurred. Even though he had been fine the whole time, now that he was conscious of it, the fact that Ri-Na called him “Everett Rohas” bothered him.
While Edwin was guessing at Ri-Na’s intentions and regretting his actions, the silence between the question and the answer grew long. Edwin hurried to reply before the silence stretched any further.
“Nothing special.”
He felt he should have added the caveat “yet,” but he swallowed it. Ri-Na looked at the tense Edwin with a pitiable gaze. Perhaps that was why he gained a bit of courage, feeling as though she would accept his fault with generosity.
‘Should I come clean right now?’ Perhaps this was the opportunity. ‘I don’t think Lady Diaz would hate it.’
Isn’t an Emperor more plausible than a commoner-born knight? *As a date, that is.* His heart hammered, oblivious to the situation. Up to this point, Edwin had never once imagined he would be rejected. That was the nature of being royalty.
Resolving himself, Edwin intended to reveal his real name to Ri-Na.
“Lady Diaz.”
“Lord Rohas.”
But as if by the trick of fate, their timing overlapped once again. Despite the courage he had summoned, Edwin readily yielded his turn to Ri-Na.
“You speak first.”
“It’s nothing big.”
Ri-Na wrinkled her nose as if feeling awkward. But seemingly believing it was something that needed to be said, she accepted Edwin’s concession. Selecting her words carefully, Ri-Na began.
“I’m not sure how much help I can be, but I will do my best to assist you. If anything happens, please consult me as well.”
She sounded as if she were looking at someone pathetic, or perhaps as if she were steeling herself for something.
‘Why would she say that?’
It was an entirely different tone from what he had expected. Edwin paused what he had been about to say to gauge the situation.
‘Has she realized that I am not Everett Rohas?’
While Edwin was slightly bewildered, Ri-Na added a word of concern.
“Don’t brush it off. Really.”
Pressed by the intensity of Ri-Na, who looked as if she wanted to seal the promise with a pinky swear, Edwin replied before he knew it.
“I’ll try.”
It was a reply into which he had packed as much sociability as he only ever reserved for Ri-Na. After all, Edwin was rarely a man who lacked power, wealth, or force. There would be almost nothing he couldn’t resolve, or anything for which he would need Ri-Na’s help.
But the answer Edwin thought was best did not seem to satisfy Ri-Na. She masked her inner thoughts with a light tone and emphasized it once more.
“It’s a promise, okay? Even small things, like if work is hard, that’s fine too.”
“Work?”
Edwin repeated the word, which had been uniquely emphasized. For a moment, he thought, *Is something happening to Ri-Na that’s making her act like this? She seemed deep in thought, perhaps…?*
The feeling of disharmony that had strangely grated on him throughout their walk in the Summer Rose Garden fell into place. The completed puzzle piece seemed plausible at a glance.
‘Were there any unusual matters in the Ministry Of Finance?’
He couldn’t think of any. He had cleaned things up appropriately after discovering Duke Camelot’s slush fund, and according to Kyle’s assessment, the new head of the department Ri-Na worked for knew how to keep his head down.
But Edwin could not easily set his mind at ease. It might be a matter that hadn’t reached his reports yet. Still, it could certainly be a source of worry for Ri-Na. Edwin carefully scrutinized Ri-Na’s expression.
“Yes, work.”
At the same time, Ri-Na was also observing Edwin. However, because they were both focused only on observing each other, they didn’t notice that the other was scrutinizing them. Each interpreted the other’s words by weaving them into what they had on their own minds.
“What specifically?”
Edwin cast his line first. If Ri-Na just told him, he was ready to turn the Ministry Of Finance upside down to solve it. The intent was symmetrical, like an image reflected in a mirror, but regardless, it was in a form almost identical to what Ri-Na was secretly hoping for.
Hoping not to appear too rude, Ri-Na answered cautiously.
“There are all sorts of things that happen when working in the Imperial Palace, you know. Like being given tasks so difficult they can’t be solved, or making a big mistake that ruins something important.”
Edwin etched the words given like hints into his memory. He gathered his inner gentleness and warmth and offered them to Ri-Na.
“Even if a task is difficult, you will eventually be able to solve it with help from those around you, and as for mistakes that ruin important things… well, everyone makes mistakes.”
Edwin was generally not the type to be lenient with mistakes, but the words he was saying now were sincere. However, after hearing Edwin’s answer, Ri-Na’s expression softened just a little.
“That’s a good mindset.”
After the praise came the request.
“Even if things are tough, solving it with alcohol won’t fix anything, right?”
Edwin wasn’t the type to relieve stress with alcohol. To be precise, he was the type to be wary of alcohol clouding his rationality.
“That’s true.”
When Edwin agreed so easily, Ri-Na instead wore a frustrated expression. As if she felt Edwin had dismissed her important words with an insincere answer, she looked up at the sky for a few seconds.
It didn’t seem to have much effect. Hesitating several times as if she couldn’t spit out what she wanted to say, Ri-Na eventually couldn’t hold it in any longer and blurted out.
“Especially during important missions!”
Edwin just laughed, feeling as if he had become a husband managed by a strict wife.
“Don’t laugh.”
Ri-Na pouted, seemingly unhappy with Edwin’s lack of seriousness.
“I heard His Majesty has been a bit prickly lately, so what will you do if he doesn’t tolerate mistakes?”
At first, she had spoken lightly as if joking, but Ri-Na’s expression gradually hardened. As if she were afraid the more she thought of the Emperor.