Kishin looked as if he had frozen at the sudden proposal.
Claisey hurriedly added, “No, that’s not it—what I meant is, it’s nothing strange. I just need an excuse to turn down my second sister’s request.”
“Is an excuse absolutely necessary?”
“If I say I don’t want to go because I can’t bear to be away from someone I like for a long time, my family will think poorly of me.”
Claisey explained earnestly, but Kishin still seemed unable to grasp her meaning.
“You know the laws of our country, Sir Kishin. If my family, especially my parents, view me negatively, it puts me at a disadvantage in many ways. My reputation in high society will worsen, I won’t be able to get help when I need it, they’ll refuse to provide guarantees, and later on—”
Claisey stopped talking when she realized that the more she spoke, the more perplexed Kishin’s expression became.
His reaction made her feel like a snob.
No, wait—don’t people live like this in the real world?
*‘That man seems to have a talent for living completely detached from reality.’*
Claisey waited for Kishin to say something, but when he remained silent with a confused look on his face, she finally continued.
“Anyway, if I say I can’t go because I’m seeing someone and marriage is being discussed, my second sister will understand. She might hate it, but she’ll accept it. That’s what I meant.”
Only then did Kishin confirm, as if he finally understood. “You mean a fake excuse?”
In that instant, Claisey felt a wave of inexplicable sorrow.
*‘That’s not it at all.’*
Claisey truly wanted to marry Kishin. She didn’t want a fake marriage of convenience; she wanted a fast-tracked union that skipped all the complicated formalities.
In that moment, the image of herself being dragged off by her second sister against her will, the suffering she endured two years ago, the years of harassment from Merran, the malicious gossip from those who didn’t know the truth, and the guilt she felt toward her eldest sister all overlapped—and tears finally welled up in her eyes.
When Claisey, who had been speaking so clearly, shed a single tear, Kishin looked flustered.
“Miss Claisey? Did I say something wrong?”
“No, it’s not that. I just… my emotions overwhelmed me.”
“Suddenly?”
“Suddenly.”
Claisey quickly wiped away her tears and offered a sheepish smile.
She knew this wasn’t something worth crying over. Hadn’t she just started developing genuine feelings for Kishin?
Since they weren’t even officially dating yet, it was natural for Kishin to be unable to accept her sudden proposal.
Besides, Kishin didn’t know the extent of what she had been suffering through for years—the false rumors and Merran’s relentless harassment.
However, tears and emotions were strange things. It had been fine while she was holding them back, but that one single tear had ruined all her composure.
Even though she tried to smile, tears continued to drip down.
Claisey felt ashamed rather than sad, but once the tears started, they flowed uncontrollably.
*‘What a state to be in!’*
Unable to bear Kishin’s troubled expression, Claisey rushed out into the hallway.
As soon as she opened the door, she ran into Anna, who looked bewildered.
Anna was holding a cake plate, and when she made eye contact with Claisey, she hurriedly shook her head.
It seemed she had eavesdropped on the conversation and was trying to signal something, but Claisey couldn’t decipher what Anna was trying to say.
Feeling nothing but shame and sorrow, Claisey brushed past Anna and ran down the hallway.
“Miss Claisey!”
She heard Kishin’s voice behind her, but she couldn’t stop.
***
Kishin was about to chase after Claisey when he stopped upon encountering Anna.
The maid, realizing she had been caught eavesdropping, turned beet red and apologized.
“I am sorry, Sir Kishin. I didn’t mean to listen in. I was trying to enter the room, but the two of you were having such a serious conversation that I didn’t want to interrupt.”
Kishin was annoyed by the intrusion, but he was more curious about something else.
Instead of scolding Anna, he pointed in the direction Claisey had run and asked, “Did I say something wrong?”
“No, sir. You didn’t say anything of the sort.”
“Then why did Miss Claisey suddenly cry?”
“That is…”
Kishin could tell this elderly maid knew something. The way her eyes darted around, looking flustered, made it seem as if she were debating whether or not to speak.
Back at the Guard Station, the more someone fidgeted, the more Kishin would have pressed them for an answer.
But this was Claisey’s home, and the person before him was an elderly maid.
Usually, long-serving servants had been in a household for years. This woman must have known Claisey her entire life.
Kishin waved a hand at the stammering maid and said, “No. If it’s difficult to say, don’t. I don’t want to put Miss Claisey in a difficult position. I will ask her myself.”
With that, Kishin walked off in the direction Claisey had run.
***
Anna stared at his retreating back, lost in thought.
Kishin’s attitude—his refusal to hear things behind someone’s back if it was something that would be difficult for the other person to share—left a deep impression on her.
Anna was genuinely impressed.
*‘I thought our young lady only liked him because of his looks. His character is quite decent, too!’*
In truth, Anna hadn’t liked Kishin much until now.
Not only was her first impression of him poor, but she also believed he was the source of the rift between Merran and Claisey.
She had also worried about Claisey’s volatile emotions whenever she received letters or bouquets from him.
But what worried her most was the fact that Kishin’s background was simply too prestigious.
The parents of a man with such excellent status and such striking looks would naturally be snobbish.
Would such parents allow their son to marry Claisey, who was dogged by malicious rumors? Anna thought not.
Hadn’t even her own biological parents, Count and Countess Kalasi, essentially given up on her?
*‘It’s a real shame.’*
Anna shook her head and set the cake plate down on the parlor table.
***
Claisey did not know what had happened while she was away.
However, she realized she had to stop running.
*‘I’m all cried out.’*
Her emotions, which had exploded for a moment, had vanished on their own after about five minutes.
Claisey held her forehead and lamented. It was only five minutes of crying—why had she been so unable to control herself?
*‘Sir Kishin must think I’m strange.’*
Claisey bumped her head against the wall a few times, and then, unable to help herself, began walking back the way she came.
Before long, she ran into Kishin.
Kishin looked confused again as Claisey, who had dashed away, came walking back on her own.
“Miss Claisey. Are you alright?”
Claisey scrambled for a lie.
“I’m sorry for surprising you. I felt ashamed, thinking that I had been rejected by you, Sir Kishin.”
“I did not reject you, Miss Claisey.”
“You were flustered when you heard my proposal.”
“Because it was too sudden.”
“That counts as a rejection…”
Claisey muttered, feeling dejected. Why did everything have to go wrong like this?
She hadn’t intended to propose to him today. She had wanted to wait at least a month.
She had wanted to wait until they were close enough for him to trust her over the rumors, even if he heard them.
But during this time, when she should have been growing closer to him, they were going to be apart for three months. And when Kishin held her back earlier, he had pointed out the very behavior of her second sister that had been bothering her so much.
When all these events suddenly coalesced, the words had impulsively tumbled out.
Claisey regretted it again and again, but the words could not be taken back.
Kishin looked around and suggested, “This is the middle of the hallway. Let’s talk elsewhere.”
The two entered a nearby drawing room.
Since Claisey, the mistress of the house, rarely used this room, it was usually empty, though it remained furnished with basic pieces.
As soon as she entered, Claisey approached a chair covered in a light layer of dust and placed her arms on the backrest.
Her chest felt heavy. At Kishin’s suggestion… she had followed him here, but she had nothing more to say.
The joy she had felt upon seeing him had long since faded. After weeping earlier, she had finished sorting through her emotions.
Still, Claisey summoned her courage and asked.
“What is it you want to talk about?”
“I still don’t quite understand.”
“I’ve already told you everything.”
“No. Lady Claisey, you suddenly proposed to me, then ran off claiming your emotions had overwhelmed you. Afterward, you said you ran away because you were embarrassed about being rejected. None of that is an explanation.”
“My emotions overwhelmed me. I was embarrassed. That is the entire explanation.”
“No. Why did you suddenly propose? Let’s start from there.”
A vein pulsed on Claisey’s forehead.
“Are you interrogating me now?”
“I don’t understand, so I am trying to understand.”
“If you don’t understand, you can just leave it at that. Why go so far as to interrogate me?”
“I am trying to analyze it because I like you, Lady Claisey.”
“!”
*I wish he had used a word other than ‘analyze’,* Claisey thought, her mouth agape.
But Kishin looked serious. He appeared to be completely sincere. It looked as if he were trying hard to track the line of her emotions, which she herself struggled to keep up with.
That earnest attitude moved Claisey’s heart, which had turned cold along with her tears.
Claisey hesitated before confessing.
“Actually, this is a money problem.”
“!”