17.
It was said that she had slapped the landlord and his wife quite soundly. The news was difficult to reconcile with the image of that thin, fragile woman actually possessing the strength to strike someone.
It was unexpected. In his presence, she always acted like a frightened rabbit.
Yet, considering she had spoken her mind even while trembling with terror before him, she clearly possessed a hidden streak of courage.
*I will put you to sleep.*
The words she had spoken suddenly crossed his mind.
When was the last time he had actually slept?
He couldn’t even remember.
Even if his body was superior to others and his senses were far more acute, he was still human. A human who could not survive without rest.
Ever since he lost his sight, he had been unable to find peace; he was trapped in a cycle of constantly suppressing his rampaging senses. He would endure and endure until he reached his breaking point, and then he would pass out. When he awoke half a day later, it was merely to a continuation of the agony.
Was there any point in enduring like this?
He had asked himself that before. Should he just die? Would it be easier then?
The conclusion was always the same: he could not.
If he were to die without an heir, the Ducal Family would crumble quickly under the pressure of the Emperor and his opposing factions. Had he known it would come to this, perhaps he should have attempted marriage. But because of his senses—far more sensitive than any other’s—he had long ago abandoned the thought of living in such close proximity to another.
He had planned to entrust the succession to one of his sister’s children when he grew older. However, his sister had only one son. Since the Empire did not recognize women as heads of households, he required at least one more boy to secure the lineage.
Gerald smiled bitterly.
Would his own descent into madness from the pain come first? Or would his sister manage to have another son?
* * *
Marin held two books that looked as boring as possible to her chest while browsing the rest. Her steps, which had been scanning the titles along the bookshelves, stopped in front of the section dedicated to natural science.
She was not a female protagonist who could look at a passing blade of grass and identify it as a rare medicinal herb. As an extremely ordinary person—let’s set aside the fact that she possessed memories of a past life—the only thing she could do was rely on her recollection of the novel’s contents.
Fortunately, she knew the name of the herb that would cure the Duke’s eyes, but she had no idea what it looked like.
She pulled out a book labeled ‘Herbalism’ and flipped through it. The author was truly remarkable; the book was meticulously organized, complete with names, illustrations, and the specific effects of each plant.
“Mandlesong, Mandlesong.”
Marin repeated the name of the herb from the novel and scanned the pages.
“What about Mandlesong?”
“I need—”
Zero, who had approached silently, was looking up at her with a curious expression.
Marin quickly closed the book and hid it behind her back.
“Why do you need it? That common weed.”
“A common weed?”
Marin’s eyes widened.
“Yes. It’s not in that book. Mandlesong isn’t a medicinal herb, so I didn’t include it.”
“Are you, perhaps, the author of this book, Zero?”
Marin was startled and checked the cover again. The author’s name was simply written as ‘0’.
“That’s my signature.”
“You’re truly amazing!”
“I am a bit amazing, aren’t I?”
Zero lifted his chin with pride.
*Ah, how cute.* Marin looked down at him with a satisfied gaze, then shook her head. *This person is an adult man. Get a grip.*
“But Zero, is Mandlesong not a medicinal herb?”
“No. It’s just a common weed you see on the side of the road.”
Marin tried hard to keep her lips from twitching. Perhaps she could find it easily without much effort.
“What does that common weed look like?”
“Just a moment.”
Zero struggled to pull a thick, heavy book from the shelf. When Marin moved to help him, he blocked her with a wave of his hand.
“Here, this one.”
Zero opened the book in one motion to reveal an illustration of a Mandlesong.
“This is a Mandlesong?”
“Yes.”
Marin stared at the picture, her eyes wide with astonishment. The illustration looked remarkably like the dandelions she had seen in her past life. The flower was small and yellow, with a long stem and leaves that gathered at the root, spreading out to the sides. It was a common roadside flower, yet she had never known its name.
“So this is a Mandlesong. Does it not get used as a medicinal herb at all?”
“Other than the flower’s scent being as cool as mint, it doesn’t really have any efficacy.”
“Oh….”
Marin let her voice trail off, unable to hide her disappointment. As expected, no one other than the female protagonist knew the true utility of the Mandlesong. And since even she wouldn’t know until much later, Marin was the only one who currently possessed the secret.
Zero, feeling proud of his imparted knowledge, put the book back. Marin subconsciously read the title of the next volume, and her pupils shook.
*The Poison of Nature?*
Her voice, having read the title aloud, came out as a strangled whisper.
“Mandlesong has poisonous components, so it was included in this book. Though it only causes an upset stomach.”
Zero chattered on, as innocent as a child. Marin felt as if she had been dealt a fatal blow; she staggered back without realizing it.
*Poison. It was a poison.*
Using poison on the Duke was on an entirely different level than telling a lie.
“Are you alright?”
Seeing her face turn ashen, Zero asked with concern.
“I’m fine. I’ll take my leave now.”
“Come play again.”
Zero waved his arms energetically to say goodbye. Marin waved back mechanically and turned away.
* * *
Marin walked down the hallway with a troubled expression. In the novel, the Duke’s eyes were cured after he was fed the extract of a Mandlesong. She had intended to use a very small amount to help alleviate the Duke’s suffering, thinking it a way to repay the grace she had received.
But finding out that the herb was poisonous changed everything. Even if it were a mild toxin that only caused an upset stomach, poison was still poison. No matter how small the dose, feeding it to the Duke would be a one-way ticket to the gallows.
*As expected, the female protagonist is different.*
To be able to neutralize that poison and restore the Duke’s sight—it required a level of skill she didn’t possess. She felt sorry for the Duke’s suffering, but she absolutely could not risk the hangman’s noose.
“I’ll just wait a little longer for the female protagonist to arrive.”
Marin squeezed her eyes shut.
* * *
“His Grace says he will not be receiving reports today.”
“Is he sleeping?”
Olive gave a bitter smile and shook his head without a word.
Marin clasped her hands tightly in pity. The Duke was suffering again.
“Since today is your first day after moving, please head home early.”
“Thank you for your consideration. May I read the book I borrowed from the archives in advance?”
“Of course.”
Marin said goodbye to Olive and left the office. The sun had not yet set, so bright sunlight poured through the hallway windows. On the other side, however, the windows were covered with heavy black curtains, looking as deep and dark as a jagged cliff.
Marin stopped exactly at the line where the hallway was divided into day and night.
“It’s like it’s warning me not to cross over.”
Muttering to herself, Marin glanced around. Human psychology being what it is, one always wants to do what they are told not to. She stepped into the dark hallway as quietly as a cat. A long, dim, and oppressive corridor unfolded before her.
*I’m sorry….*
If only it weren’t for the toxic component, she could have somehow helped him.
Just as she was clutching the borrowed book and about to turn back, the office door suddenly swung open with a bang. Startled, Marin jumped back toward the bright side of the hall.
Olive looked around, spotted her, and quickly approached.
“Lady Marin. I see you haven’t left yet.”
Marin blushed like a child caught doing something wrong.
“I was just about to….”
“His Grace wishes for you to come in now.”